dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
