Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
