we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
