Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
