break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
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