There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
