Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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