apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
