We're like a lot better than the average bears
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
It's official drugs can't kill me
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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