Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
