I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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