I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
