Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Houston, we have a blender
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
