my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize