it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
