Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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