yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
