im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
