I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
