How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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