Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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