My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
