When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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