There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize