It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
