She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
