Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
