im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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