I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize