I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Randomize
