so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Randomize
