My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
