I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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