just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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