a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
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