Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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