I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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