How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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