And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
