spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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