Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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