ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
