my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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