apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
