why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
The air was thick with penises
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
