also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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