Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
