so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
