he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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