Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
